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American Ballads and Folk Songs |
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He saw there were some improvements to make,
For he felt his own reputation at stake.
An idea struck him, and he swore by his horns
To make a complete vegetation of thorns.
He studded the land with the prickly pear,
And scattered the cactus everywhere 5
The Spanish dagger, sharp-pointed and tall,
And at last the chollas to outstick them all.
He imported the Apaches direct from hell, With a legion of skunks, with a loud, loud smell To perfume the country he loved so well. And then for his life he couldn't see why The river needed any more water supply, And he swore if he gave it another drop You might have his head and horns for a mop.
He filled the river with sand till 'twas almost dry, And poisoned the land with alkali ; And promised himself on its slimy brink To control all who from it should drink. He saw there was one improvement to make, So he imported the scorpion, tarantula, and snake, That all that might come to this country to dwell Would be sure to think it was almost hell.
He fixed the heat at a hundred and 'leven, And banished forever the moisture from heaven; And remarked as he heard his furnaces roar That the heat might reach five hundred more. And after he fixed things so thorny and well He said, 'I'll be damned if this don't beat hell.' Then he flapped his wings and away he flew &nd vanished from earth in a blaze of blue.
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